Detail of “Talking with God,” 12×12 pastel drawing by Pia f. Walker, Copyright 2008 Attaining Creativity 

I have spent a week simply floating, attempting to hold down to an anchor, to keep moving on, to seem like I am doing something. And yet this nagging feeling kept me still. Part of it was fear, this fear of creating something great, of having utter and total fun all the time, fear of being myself. And the other part, well that too was fear, fear of attempting to float in a reality that seems to crashing all around me.

Yet as I shared my dilemma with a few people close to me, they reminded me, in their wisdom, that allowing fear to win during those times that seem chaotic, times like world wars or food lines or devastating depressions, accomplishes nothing. Yes, the upcoming times will be difficult. Uncertainty and definitely insecurity will surround our days for weeks, months. Although I should be no means continue as if nothing has changed from the heydays of the golden bounty this country has been experiencing during the past years, I SHOULD not look forward wearing only black clothes and move forward as if in mourning. I have been reminded that people have survived, lived through, sometimes even with great memories and triumphs, during those World Wars and the Great Depression.

At this point in history, where we have no control over our jobs (if we are employed by others), no control over our money (if it is managed by others), where it seems like we may have no control over anything, we do still have control over ourselves, our attitudes, our actions.

So I prepared yesterday for another market day, dressed in a fun fall outfit full of bright oranges and deep browns, kept a smile that I truly felt, and interacted with human beings. And I was rewarded by coming home with enough cash to make the day worthwhile. Sure, there were less people out, less people spending, less people with a positive attitude. Yet somehow I survived the day, just as my wiser friend said I would.

As I was preparing for the day, I went through my coffee in hand and laptop on the other routine, reading some blog feeds. As I have become accustomed to, when I put something, whether it is a feeling or a request, out in the universe, a response does come, in its own time of course. So, if you are feeling lost, are wondering whether continuing in an endeavor of creativity that has no safety net is a good idea during these uncertain times, check out these blog entries. Neither I nor the writers promise you a solution. Instead, after reading these wonderful words, I do hope that you feel safer in your own self, less fearful of being you, of moving forward. I was reminded of why I have chosen to take this route of color and texture and utter fun. In my own essence, I did not have a monetary goal that I needed to reach – in fact in all of the business exercises I have written that has never made the top of the list. What I did want to achieve was: “making creations that inspire people to attain their own creativity, trust their own views, and discover their own voice.”

So, if you are feeling lost, or simply need a reminder of why you have chosen your path, read:

“ Fact Sheet,” a blog entry by Christine Mason Miller,

“Dreams and Doubts,” a blog entry by Graciel. Not only is her writing exquisite but the message is simple: sometimes, you just have to release the doubt and trust.

As I head out into today, which sometimes in itself is a challenge, I will be surrounded by a fall wind storm. I will smile and laugh and play, and enjoy the wind and allow it to carry me onto the next plateau. It may be a bumpy road, but boy will it be FUN!

“Fall Winds,” 12×12 inch pastel drawing, Copyright 2008 Attaining Creativity

My coffee table, and work desk, is getting filled with books. I though I would share some of the titles:

• “Marketing without advertising,” by Michael Phillips and Salli Rasberry, part of the NOLO library (http://www.nolo.com/)
  It took a while for me to warm up to this book. Although the tips were great, they seemed geared towards businesess that were already well established. However, after reaching chapter 7, I’m beginning to find ideas and exercises that fit my needs. The book is geared exactly towards what the title says, focusing instead on getting referrals and word of mouth advertising. What I do like about this way of marketing is that it is great for startups with low (or even non-existing) marketing budgets. The book does not stray away from advertising, but it leads the reader through exercises about exactly who you should be marketing to, so that you are reaching a specifically targeted customer group that is more likely to respond, instead of every customer responding to your ad just because of low prices. 
• “The ultimate small business marketing toolkit,” by Beth Goldstein (http://www.m-edge.com/)
  This book focuses on helping the reader figure out who their customer base is. It comes with a full set of exercises that the reader can use to find the best customer base and the best ways to reach out to them.
• “The silk painting workshop,” by Jane Venables
  As I’m looking for various ways to expand my art, I saw a class for silk painting. In preparation, I checked out some books from the library. This book is definitely old-school, starting from scratch and showing the reader exactly what will happen with different dyes and silk. It takes the reader through exercises that will allow the artist to see what kind of experiments they can further try. The first chapter is a great primer that introduces the reader to every tool necessary for silk painting. It is written in very simple language and explains every tool and technique in great details.
• “Creative silk painting,” by Diane Tuckman and Jan Janas
  Although this book does have a short primer for the silk painting beginner, its focus is more on experimenting and trying new techniques that are more appropriate for a more experienced silk painter. It does give the painter a glimpse of all the wonderful creations that are possible through this artistic medium. 

What is on your bookshelf? 

Garden photo, by Pia f. Walker

During the last year, I have learned tricks for how to get myself moving. Usually, if I don’t know what to do, the worst thing I can do is sit still. So I go out into the garden. I rake leaves, pull up weeds, clean a flower bed. The simple act of doing physical labor, of focusing just on moving muscles, prevents my mind from worrying.

Las week, I saw miniature pumpkins and gourds for sale. I personally hate how we as a society have moved forward, literally sped through seasons and holidays, by starting to sell Halloween merchandise in August and Christmas ornaments in September. Here in California, we are experiencing 90 degree days without a hint of fall winds in sight. Halloween is the furthest thing in my mind!

Yet my spirit needed a lift, a giant upgrade to first class. And these vibrant little pumpkins, golden orange, sunset red burned, spoke to me in the spirit of fire, of winds shifting souls, stirring up mysteries and new possibilities.

Miniature pumpkins and gourds photo, by Pia f. Walker 

So as a looked over my garden, I began to catalog what I could use to decorate my front porch. I’ve never done that before. My husband designed our front porch so that it could be decorated, so that I could set it up however I wanted it to be like.

My fennel plants were full of 8 foot stalks topped with yellow bunches of flowers. I begun to cut, to trim, to bundle and create my own version of corn maze cornstalks bunches. The trimmed edges gave off licorice smell – and still do whenever I walk by. The bundles of fennel became the background for those miniature pumpkins and artsy gourds.

An old fabric ghost, stained by vegetable patch dirt after 10 years of use as a scarecrow, now hangs from the porch. Overall, my little porch now has a fall, Halloween garden container decoration.

Front porch photo, by Pia f. Walker

I sat back, and took in my cleaned front yard flower beds and the fall porch decorations, and hyperbolized into my art. I began to wonder about how to stretch my business resources. When I was preparing for my first art fair, I used packing boxes dressed up with fabric remnants as my greeting card displays. I borrowed card tables from friends and family. Everything was borrowed or an unused item sitting in my house.

I have always found using my current resources as a fun way to get things going. Yet I always feel strange as I begin to be around people who are always buying new things or think of bootstrapping as a $1,000 a day habit.

When I begun to think about the idea of running my own business, I didn’t find any references for people who had no credit, no savings, and no resources of any kind. Every reference assumed that the typical entrepreneur could afford to pay bookkeepers, lawyers, branding consulting, etc, all before actually making any more off their business idea.

I began to wonder if I had the sufficient amount of resources to being this adventure. Yet after some days in the garden, my head cleared and I remembered stories. Stories of people seeing the world by working on ships, washing dishes at different Parisian restaurants. Stores of people with $5 to their name but friends and family who believed in them enough to become “quiet” partners and provide start-up funds. Stories of people with resources they were unaware of until they cleared their minds and saw the depth of their rich portfolios.

I’m nowhere near a place where I can breathe easily; in fact I’ve never hyperventilated so much in my life. What I have learned, however, is that the resources exist, regardless of how few you think there might be. It pays to talk, to ask, to put your problems out in the open. This gives them voice, life, and it takes some of the pressure off you. It allows you to breathe, to give your spirit and mind the space for a solution to bloom.

Fall decorations, by Pia f. Walker 

So start by sitting in your garden, looking at the materials that have grown by the help of your own hands. You are capable of creating solutions. Sometimes it just takes time and a little bit of weed-pulling.

When I was looking to find my art style, I drew mainly with my eyes closed. The exercise was to stretch my art muscles, swirling pencils here and there, mixing colors, and wetting papers. Without an end concept in mind, these art sessions started to demonstrate my color palette and the way my wrist would move as I pushed the pencil across the paper.

It took a month of constant experimenting, and then one day, my style was just there. It took 3 simple strokes across the sketch pad and there was my first drawing.

I thought, back then, that this style would last for years. Instead, it has matured, stretched, and expanded itself. The main figures, and the way that my pencil flows, remains the same. It is when I have pushed this style, tried to adapt it to mainstream art definitions, tried to make my drawings have some worth (because I felt they were too simple to be called art), that I have found my style diminish. Although I may have been happy with the end result, I have noticed that the drawings I feel alive with are the ones that are uninhibited by my limits or desires to fit in.

Out of those initial experiments, I have come across a color palette that has, unconsciously, always surrounded me. And yet as I continue to experiment with my art and my life, I have found this color palette to expand, grow, shift in directions and colors I would have steered far, far away from.

Although I sketch interesting poses while I am at art fairs and markets, I supplement my “idea” pad with magazine cut outs. I look for color combinations and interesting human poses (since I don’t have models to rely on, I use these cut outs as reference – and they usually work better than me trying to stand in front of a mirror while I try to awkwardly sketch a pose).

I have finally realized that even though I sketch and create a color palette before I officially start a drawing, I need to stand back once I have started to draw the final piece. No matter how much I have planned for the perfect drawing, sometimes the drawing knows better and I need to diverge from my plan and just take a step back.

A page from my sketchbook

The initial outline of a drawing, along with its designated color palette

The inspiration for “Kicking It”

The starting sketch for “First Kiss”

“Kicking It” (conte and pastel drawing), Copyright © Attaining Creativity 2008.
Purchase the original.

I admit that I am more of a Web junky than I would like to be. I need to check my e-mail box as soon as my first cup of coffee is ready in the morning, and I need to check up on blogs that I follow or newsletters I subscribe to.

Because of the various entrepreneurial newsletters I subscribe to, I keep seeing lectures and seminars on Viral Marketing. That seems to be the hot, new term these days – that or Web 2.0. Social websites like MySpace and Facebook are beginning to be used as the new networking source of the 2000’s. Along with Twitter (a software used to follow a person), these terms are being thrown all over the web.

So instead of putting out a couple of hundred of dollars on a seminar, I went to my local library’s website and looked for books (I love to physically read books in front of me, not on a computer screen). Even up in the Santa Cruz Mountains, my library system is keeping up with the times, and I had them deliver to me “Facebook: The Missing Manual.”

Although the book was published in January 2008, it is already outdated (that tells you how quickly this site is progressing). The book is geared more towards connecting with old friends and finding a job in the 9-5 world. However, as a starter and a great resource on how to set up privacy restrictions, this is a great place to start.

With the help of the book, I set up my profile and a page for my art business . I have to admit that when I first went into the Facebook website, I was perplexed as to how to make it an advantageous business tool. The book actually helped in providing me access to tools that remain a bit hidden in the regular layout of the website, and although I still don’t think it is the most intuitive site, I am beginning to feel more comfortable using it. Another great thing about all these new social sites and software is that they are quickly becoming interactive. For example, I can link my blog to my Facebook page and eliminate the double typing or copying and pasting. And maybe, just maybe, Twitter and Facebook might be connected too – that is a future research project. I have to admit that ever since I first heard about Twitter, I’ve secretly wanted to join. I just have to make sure that I’m doing plenty of art business related events when I do, so that my updates are relevant to my artwork and not just “I’m currently picking tomatoes from my front garden patch.”

As with any tool, it is mainly about how you use it that shows how relevant and useful it can be. And I do realize that it isn’t the answer to all answers. I still have to physically connect with people, show them my work, and make them fans the old-fashioned way (and limit my Facebook time to maybe 15 minutes a day, or every other day). However, having another “crumb” with my name on it on the web shouldn’t hurt either – it just gives people another venue to find me through.

So, check out my links – I would love it if you became a “fan”!

Update: As I’m moving my business forward in “bootstrapping” fashion, I’m always on the lookout of getting some valuable information for free (I know, I know, that’s tough). Besides checking out the library, if you are interested in how Facebook can help your business (and there is a business side to art and creativity), check out this FREE teleseminar: “The 1st Secret Behind Creating Facebook Connections”, hosted by Jen Blackert and Mary Pat Kavanagh, taking place on Friday, September 19th, 2008, at 2PM Eastern.

I may be a jumper when it comes to jumping off the ledge into this business thing, but even I like to be as prepared and organized as possible when it comes to new experiences (we are all made up made of complex idiosyncrasies).

Most artists and crafters I’ve talked to make it a habit to “walk” a fair before deciding to participate. There are even magazine subscriptions (http://www.craftsfairguide.com/) available that provide artists with feedback and comments on fairs. The good thing about weekly markets is that you can check them out and have a pretty accurate sense of the customer demographic and visitor rate and be pretty sure that those stats will remain accurate in the following weeks, when you will actually be a participating vendor. Fairs that happen once a year can change drastically from year to year, in appearance, customer visits, etc. Although reviews and vendor feedbacks are helpful, things like economy can change drastically in a year.

Although I knew of most farmers markets in my region, I basically went to Google and typed in “city” I was looking at and “farmer’s market” and would get linked to the management company that ran the market. A broader search for “California farmers markets” gave me even more hits. After finding management companies, the next thing to check is whether the farmer’s market does accept craft vendors (some are solely organic produce or just produce).

Most year-long markets will accept applications ongoing, but it is always worth a call to find out if there really are spaces still available or to see how long the waiting list is. Markets that run only for half the year or a bit longer might be full already, but you never know – there may still be some weeks where there are a couple of empty spaces (people are out on vacation or for other reasons can’t come a particular week, etc.).

Once you find some that fit your schedule, are near you (whatever your own criteria is), go check them out.

- Get there at the same time the vendors do – this will allow you to see what the set-up process is. Is there a particular street that the vendors use to get in, parking areas?

- Stay for at least an hour after the market officially starts, and possibly longer – some markets take at least an hour just to rev up, while others are hopping from the get go.

- Take notes – how many artists/crafters similar to you, how many craft/art vendors overall, what kind of set up do they have, how many people are stopping by their booths, and how people are actually buying.

- Get acquainted with the demographics and note age groups (are there moms with kids, mainly couples, baby boomers, yuppies, college kids, young families starting out?). This will be helpful if you already know what your customer base is, allowing you to really see if the market you are checking out is a good fit for your products.

- Check out the logistics for yourself: are there bathrooms nearby that you can use, will you need a canopy (is it an empty parking lot or a tree-filled street), is there parking near the site or will you have to leave your items unattended while you re-park your car after unloading, is there police/private security on-site (if you have to leave things unattended and are by yourself)

- Go up to vendors and ask questions. I usually get at least two people at each market I attend asking me for the inside scoop, like cost, experience, etc. You’ll probably get some really great inside tidbits that aren’t stated on a website or application.

Although every week at a market is different, doing some of this prep work while you visit will give you a good idea about whether the market is a good fit to begin with. Some, you will almost instantly see, are not, and doing this kind of leg work will save you not only money and time but prevent aggravation as well.

“Courage” (conte and pastel drawing), Copyright © Attaining Creativity 2008   

In the period of simply one month, things change. I can remember hot days spent in cool darkness, wondering how I would earn money through my art. I would research markets, make drives to hot asphalt parking lots to check them out, and find they weren’t a good fit. Over and over, these day trips proved both fruitful and fruitless. And yet I found possibilities, did the paperwork and got into two weekly markets (Old Monterey market on Tuesdays and San Jose Downtown on Fridays).

Now as I set up my booth smoothly in less than an hour, I am amazed at the transformation. My first booth seemed cute in the living room of my house, and stood up to sprinkling rain and hot weather. Yet it also limited the amount and variety of items I could sell. So the display grew

And now here I am, a month into this selling journey, still finding new things to be fearful of and accomplish. I’ve recently acquired a merchant account so that I can accept credit cards (that is a physics lesson in itself). But I need to overcome the fear of messing up a credit card transaction.

It will, however, work out. I am no more settled in my weekly routine as well. I spend days drawing, printing, doing administrative duties, and selling. My days are beginning to become booked with productivity and I am realizing that I can do this.

I send weekly updates to family and friends, and their feedback and suggestions are always a boost. But I am finding that my down days have become almost non-existent. I know what I need to do – the mystery is clear now. And so I must set forth and do it.

“Coffee and Milk,” (conte, and pastel drawing), Copyright © Attaining Creativity 2008   

The weeks have passed quickly and as I have been focused on getting my art out of the studio and into the experiment of having it be bought by real people, the task of putting together blog entries has fallen off the list.

The simple act of drawing, sketching, searching for inspiration, and playing with colored pastels has been inundated with business plans and annual budget projections and meeting with bankers and merchant vendors and weekly market managers. In the beginning, I became impatient with these “business” chores, as they seemed like distractions, disengaging me from the act of actually pursuing art.

And yet the mere act of attempting to plan out the next year, the act of calling bankers (who are not stiff or unapproachable at all, by the way), and the act of interacting with other businesses has allowed me to begin to tweak my own business plan. The simple act of exchanging ideas, of being forced to talk to people about what I do, and what I’m thinking of doing, has allowed me to bloom as an artist.

I am realizing that this journey of attaining my own creativity is taking me through a complete, circular revamp of myself. It is showing me pieces of who I may yet become, of who I was and have lost, and of whom I am today. It is showing me not to be afraid, or to be afraid for a minute and then push forward. It is pushing me to attempt to drop in on chamber of commerce network mixers (I’m still working on my fear of that one).

And every day, it is forcing me to identify and respect myself, as I sell my creations to the world. It is giving me the confidence to allow my customers to see my art through their own eyes, to interpret it through their own experiences. It is a quiet interchange, between these customers and myself. I have stood quietly, seeing men and women look through my stack of greeting cards, and look again, and pull cards out and think, put them aside, and keep looking. Sometimes these customers are kind enough to share with me the reason for their choices. These conversations have become part of a thread that adds to my own art, my own journey.

And I find myself craving these days when I drive to the weekly markets, set up my booth, and await these customers. I eagerly await a new face that will share with me a story that I have never heard before, a story that will inspire me to keep going, to keep creating. Their stories will become part of my story, and it keeps going and going, in a path that will survive for years, for generations.

This is something I never planned to achieve, this comfort in facing potential customers. I have grown comfortable in the fact that people will keep walking by my booth without a second look. That is okay. I have grown confident in my own work, and realize that my history, my memories, my interpretation of the details of life, have found compatriots. This is okay too.

It is with that confidence, small as it may be at the beginning of this journey, that I tackle all the other harsher realities of being in business. Yet I am beginning to learn and feel comfortable in the fact that I will always be standing on shifting sand, if only a little more comfortable than I was a month ago.

“Tree of Hearts,” (conte, and pastel drawing), Copyright © Attaining Creativity 2008

It never fails that when I write or think about something, the universe responds and overwhelms me with support and information about the same topic I’ve thought of. So in response to my latest blog entry, the universe has provided me with this matching inspiration:

• The same church sign that dared me to jump in, this week says: “It is too soon to quit.” Could this have any better timing?
• In watching a little league game, I overhear a 6-year old yell out: “You don’t have to swing if you don’t like it.” We may be trying to force things to happen because we need money or for something, anything, to happen, that we go down a road that ultimately ends in disaster. Trust your gut – if it doesn’t feel or look right, however promising it might seem - trust your gut, even if it means letting what seems like a good possibility pass by.
• Creative Every Day has posted too very fitting entries, one about rejection and one that contains a very inspiring poem by Marianne Williamson that will keep me going daily.

What are you thinking about, contemplating, worrying about? What are the little signs, all around you, guiding you forward?

“Forest of Offerings,” (conte, and pastel drawing), Copyright © Attaining Creativity 2008   

This week, I participated in three art fairs, and in each one, I met up with a person who was on the edge, the cusp, of following their dream. In some instances, it wasn’t particularly a full-time dream, but they were on the edge of either staying true to their personality or wanting to fit in with what the world deemed appropriate. In all three instances, I was more than happy to tell them to stick with their gut and to allow the world to see who they really were. As Luann Udell stated on her blog, and I’m paraphrasing: There has never been anyone like you before on this earth, and after you are gone, there will be no one just like you ever again. So, with uniqueness comes a “responsibility” to share that individuality with the world, in whatever creative form you decide.

In “The Boss of You”, by Lauren Bacon and Emira Mears, the “Personal Measure of Success” exercise asks that I write down what I defined as success (and what I highly love about this book is that while it has business savvy, it strongly encourages you to think outside of just making money and taking over the world). What surprised me, and what I kind of had known all along, was that part of my definition of success was encouraging others to follow their own path (even if it meant they wanted to be an accountant). In many instances, we all find ourselves facing a multitude of roads, and some are proven and tried and successful, and there are others that are unmarked, treacherous, and scary looking. If the Attaining Creativity blog entries can be a light along that scary path, one of the many lights, I will count myself successful.

The wonderful, and also scary, thing about unmarked paths is that each one of us will explore and find different curves and stretches along our journey. Because of our beautiful uniqueness, none of us will travel exactly the same path. And that is a beautiful thing, because it will make our story even more individual, a story that can be passed on to future generations and maintain its individuality through the ages. What we will share is the spirit, the daring of the journey. We will share the downs of spending days cutting down trees that seem to overwhelm us and the ups of reaching a clearing from where we can see the whole valley below us.

With technology that allows millions of us to share our stories, we can also find comfort and inspiration in how others are faring in their journeys. We can pass kindness forward and help others out when they are feeling low or uncertain. We can ensure that people know that they are worthy of success, and so much more, and that they shouldn’t settle for anything else.

I will end this entry with this: I sit here on a foggy, rather sad looking morning, after an unsuccessful fair in which I sat for hours without making a sale. As I listen to this song and think of the movie “Love Actually” I remember that with death comes life, with loves lost comes new loves, with mistakes come success, and with trying anything new comes heartache and smiles and an unexplainable feeling of delight. Ups come with downs, but the trick, and the secret, is that eventually the sun will come out again (as it is right now), and life will remind you, subtly, in the little details, that beauty is all around you and within you. Life will give you a kick in the butt and demand that you share yourself with the world. So, pay attention to the little details. If everything else around you feels overwhelmingly dark, look for the little light that remains. Follow it, nurture it, and watch it grow until the room is ablaze in fire. I know, I know how difficult facing that darkness is. Keep going forward.